Imposter to In Progress: Re-framing Your Fears

This episode dives deep into imposter syndrome — that sneaky voice that says “you’re not enough” even when you’re doing the work, showing up, and trying your best. I’ve been there too, especially when starting this very podcast.

Together, we’ll:
 ✨ Break down what imposter syndrome really is
 🧠 Learn how to reframe those thoughts
 💡 Shift into a learner’s mindset
 🌱 And remind each other: you don’t need to be perfect — you just need to be real.

This is your sign to show up messy, brave, and beautifully human.

🎧Take a listen and follow

Transcript

 Hey friends, welcome back — or maybe welcome for the first time. However you found your way here, maybe you’re a frequent flier, maybe you did a quick search, maybe someone that cares about you shared this but however you got here, I’m really glad you did. Just pressing play today is a sign that you're investing in yourself, and that’s something worth celebrating.

By tuning in, you’re saying, “Hey, I’m open. I want more peace, more growth, more clarity in my life.” Or maybe it’s “I just don’t want to feel like I’m crazy, that maybe I’m not as screwed up as I think I am”...and by the way, you’re not. But showing up today — that’s enough. That intention? That’s your starting point. And I’m honored to be here with you.

So today, we’re diving into something that might hit a little close to home, and it does for me — imposter syndrome.

You know that feeling when you’re doing something new, something different, or maybe even something you’re usually really good at… and yet, there’s this voice in your head that whispers: “You don’t belong here. Who do you think you are?” 

Or maybe you’re doing something you’ve been doing for a while, maybe as a mom keeping your kids and family on track, as a manager at work climbing the corporate ladder and you still hear: “You’re barely making it, you’re not that good. Everyone is going to find out.” Yeah, those voices and how do I know you’re hearing them? Because many of us hear them and it’s ok once in a while, I know I do myself, but if you’re hearing them enough to make you feel stuck, to make you feel unworthy...then we need to work thru that and turn it around.

Whether you're starting a new job, launching a creative project, becoming a parent, going back to school — that sneaky voice can pop up and make you doubt your own worth. Even if you've worked really hard, even if you're showing up, even if you're doing the all the right things — imposter syndrome has a way of making you feel like you're faking it.

Today, we’re not only going to define this — we’re going to reframe it. I’ll share a bit of my own story and walk you through how to shift from that imposter mindset to a learner’s mindset — one that invites grace, growth, and real confidence.

Let’s start with...what exactly is imposter syndrome? It’s a psychological pattern in which an individual doubts their skills, talents, or accomplishments, and has a persistent fear of being exposed as a “fraud” and I’m using my air bunny quotes here.

It doesn’t matter how much experience you have or how many things you’ve achieved — imposter syndrome doesn’t care. It’s not rooted in reality; it’s rooted in perception, it’s rooted in mindset. And often, it’s rooted in the need to be perfect which of course is completely unattainable for any and all of us. I don’t care how hard you try or who you are, you cannot be perfect in any aspect of true life..and social media posts do NOT reflect true life so no one is getting that perfection no matter how it looks from the outside.

This syndrome was first identified in 1978 by psychologists Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes, who found that many high-achieving women felt like they didn’t deserve their success. They called it “imposter phenomenon” to describe when these women felt that their accomplishments were the result of being lucky, or having convinced others to believe something that wasn’t true, and that their accomplishments were not really based on their own true abilities. These women suffered from insecurity, self doubt and the constant fear that they would be discovered as frauds. These 150 women that were studied were unable to internally identify or celebrate their accomplishments. Since then, we’ve learned that people of all genders and backgrounds can experience it.

It can sound like:

• “I just got lucky.”
• “They’re going to figure out I don’t belong here.”
• “I’m not qualified enough.”
• “I’m just pretending.”

And studies since then estimate that up to 70% of people, all genders, all walks of life, will experience imposter syndrome at some point in their lives. That means most of us are walking around with doubts that we’re too afraid to say out loud. We assume everyone else is confident, certain, and qualified — while we’re the only ones faking it. But the truth is: they’re just figuring it out too. We all are. We are all trying to figure out how best to get thru life with what we know now and what we have right now.

So let me share an example in my own story of feeling like an imposter. When I started thinking about creating this podcast, I felt excited —nervous but excited. It was after I got my life coach and mindset coach certifications but I knew with working full time that I didn’t want to try to take on clients and then not have time for them but I wanted to share more of my experiences and what I had learned over the years so I thought a podcast would be a great way to do that. I wanted to create a space where people could come to breathe, reflect, and grow. I wanted to share insights, stories, and tools to help others move through life in small ways and I loved the thought of little by little and piece by piece we grow. I bought a microphone and posted a picture of it online stating I was going to start a podcast and this forced me to hold myself accountable. But right behind that excitement was fear.

That little voice in my head said:

“Who are you to start a podcast?”
 “You’re not an expert.”
 “There are people more qualified. More experienced. Maybe more articulate.”

Even though I had a passion and my own life experiences — a deep desire to connect and encourage that felt like a mission, but still, the fear told me I wasn’t enough and the irony is, I almost didn’t start this podcast — the very podcast that exists to help people move forward, to move past fear — because I was afraid of not being good enough. Of other people’s opinions. But I chose to start anyway. I chose to let it be messy. I chose to lean into the idea that I didn’t need to be an expert — I just needed to be real. As someone has said to me time and time again...Let your mess become your message. And so here we are almost a year later and I’m still moving forward. It’s not where I want it to be but it’s going in the right direction so I have to give myself some grace and kindness as it blossoms.

And that’s what I want to invite you into today is to give yourself grace, kindness and permission to do what you do, begin what you need to begin without perfection. Know that your passion and your intention is what matters.

So how do we shift from feeling like an imposter to embracing the fact that we’re just learning — just growing — just like everyone else is? Let’s look at reframing our thoughts and here are some key reframes that have helped me — and that might help you too.

Change your thought from “I don’t know what I’m doing” to “I’m learning and figuring this out.” This reframe gives you space to breathe. You don’t need to know everything on day one. Growth happens in the doing, not in the knowing. Every time you take a step, you gather data. You learn. You adjust. And then you keep going.

Change your thought from “I’m not qualified” to “I know I have something valuable to offer.” You may not have every credential or certification, but you have perspective. You have life. You have experience that nobody else can replicate because they are not you, they may have done things that you have done but not from your life experiences. Only you have your voice and story to tell and that has value.

Change your thought from “I’m a fraud” to “I’m in process and not meant to be perfect.” Imposter syndrome wants you to believe you need to have it all together right now. But you don’t. You just need to be authentic in the stage you’re in. People will relate more to your authentic messy selves more than they will relate to perfection because they too are messy.

Change your thought from “They’ll find out” to “I’m sharing my growth.” What if we stopped worrying about anyone judging us but instead focus on reminding ourselves how far we have come. Sharing what we have learned, where we have had setbacks and every time you show yourself as an evolving human, you give others permission to do the same. It’s not about being flawless. It’s about being brave and allowing yourself to shine even when your light feels dim. And reaching out to others that have gone before you gives them a lift and helps you at the same time. I”m regularly reading what others are doing with their podcasts and getting ideas from them...why re-create the wheel and use their tire treads instead?

What if your growth is enough? What if your willingness to try, fail, adapt, and try again is exactly what makes you enough….because it is enough. You are enough and always have been.

Sometimes, imposter syndrome is about more than just fear — it’s rooted in how we were raised, educated, or socialized. Here are a few common contributing factors:

• Perfectionism — the belief that anything short of an A, 100%, the best of the best is failure because that was the pressure that you felt as a child
• Comparison culture — in today’s always on world of likes and posts, we may feel we are constantly measuring ourselves against others online
• Upbringing — being praised only for achievements or feeling like mistakes were not allowed...this is not a reflection of you but typically a reflection of what your parents needed for themselves
• And Lack of representation — being the “only one” in a space can make you question if you belong there where because of your gender, color, nationality or any other way you feel underrepresented

Understanding the root can help you untangle the belief. You’re not broken — you’ve been conditioned. But that can change with some reframing tools so let’s look at five practical tools that can help you shift your mindset:

Journal your wins..create a “proof folder” — whether you note it in your phone, write it in a notebook, or however you want to record it. Every time you receive positive feedback, complete something hard, or take a brave step out of your comfort zone, write it down. Then when doubt creeps back in look at your proof and challenge those doubts.

Speak it out loud...Imposter syndrome thrives in silence as to all the negative thoughts in our mind...they love the silence and living in the shadows of your mind. So talk to someone you trust. Share what you’re feeling. You’ll be surprised how often people say, “I’ve felt that way too.” And as I shared in my experiences, I really have felt that way too in feeling like an imposter.

Practice self compassion which of course we all need to be doing whether it’s imposter syndrome or something else. When that inner critic gets loud, pause and ask: “Would I say this to a friend?” If not, then think about what you would say to a friend and use that kinder language with yourself. You’re not failing — you’re learning.

Visualize your future self...Picture yourself a year from now from whatever you’re trying to do or choices you’ve made or maybe five years from now. Imagine how confident, calm, and more experienced you will be. Let that future version of yourself keep moving you forward and reminding yourself of what you know you can become.

Celebrate your small wins...You don’t need a massive milestone to celebrate. Every time you show up, take action, or choose growth — that’s a win. Remember it’s little by little that big change can happen.

And I’m here to tell you that just like you, I still have my moments. With podcasting, you get some great statistics that show how many downloads happen, how many people are listening and there’s been times I’ve looked and not seen the numbers I want. But I remind myself that is not why I’m here...sure that’s good for my ego but that’s not the goal. My original goal is, still is, was to help at least one person, to have at least one person be able to get unstuck, to feel more hope, to take that one step forward and I know I have done that. Many of you have shared that with me and so when I myself have those doubts, that is what is in my proof, you are my proof that I come back to. So here’s what I want to leave you with:

You are not an imposter. You are a human, growing in real time.

Your doubts are not proof of your inadequacy — they’re evidence that you care.

You don’t need to wait for perfection or permission. You just need to keep taking little steps.

This podcast didn’t start because I had all the answers. It started because I was willing to ask questions. To listen. To show up anyway and make mistakes along the way but to learn from them and keep moving forward. And that is what you’re capable of too. Once you make that part of your knowing of yourself, that you have good intentions, you are evolving, and you are growing...those voices will begin to quiet. Or at least you will be able to challenge them more and talk right back to them so they back down quicker.

If today’s episode resonated with you, I’d love for you to share it with someone who needs this reminder too. Let’s normalize being a work in progress. Let’s champion those who are showing up despite the fear. Let’s break down that imposter syndrome and remember you are worthy exactly as you are. You are allowed to learn, you are allowed to grow and to continue the journey of self love...little by little and peace by peace.